Kid returns home, forgets he was actually at hospital.

A child from Des Moines returned home today after a short stay in the new University of Iowa Stead Family Children’s Hospital in Iowa City, but he swears he’s been home the entire time.

The child in question was at Iowa’s only nationally ranked children’s hospital, but he refuses to believe he was in a hospital because “there’s no way a hospital could feel so much like home.”

His parents tried convincing the child of his hospital stay by pointing to his bandages, but the skeptical eight-year-old presented his own evidence during a press conference given in his basement.

“The room was far too cozy for a hospital,” said the skeptic. “I had my own private room, with a recliner, a fridge, personal storage with locks, a sleeping area for both my parents, an individual thermostat, a huge flat screen TV, and a nifty lighting system that let me change the colors in my room to fit my mood.”

But the future lawyer didn’t rest his case there.

“I never left home, pinky promise! Where I stayed had family lounges with Wi-Fi, laundry rooms, playrooms, a children’s theater, a children’s library, gardens, a Java House, and a press box where I could literally oversee Kinnick Stadium and watch the Hawkeyes play,” he said. “Does that sound like a hospital to you?”

Our investigators looked into the matter and concluded that it was indeed a children’s hospital, as most homes do not offer such advanced medical care. The cause of the confusion is simply that UI Stead Family Children’s Hospital was designed to meet the specific needs of children and their families to make them feel right at home.

Kids unwrap present, find new children’s hospital open for business.

Nothing is more exciting than opening a present, and kids across Iowa and beyond unwrapped a giant one on February 25 when the new University of Iowa Stead Family Children’s Hospital officially opened. Now kids from all over can get the most advanced care in a hospital built just for them.

The gargantuan gift is Iowa’s only nationally ranked children’s hospital and brings experts from every pediatric specialty together under one roof. It features all private rooms, a children’s theater, and a library, though most kids already knew that because they carefully peeked through the giftwrap when no one was looking. The new hospital will provide care for kids of all ages, from the tiniest preemies to the tallest teens, so this is one present everyone will be happy to share.

Construction of the 14 story, 164-foot-tall hospital began in the fall of 2012 in an effort to create a space especially for kids and families. Through the dedicated work of hundreds of construction team members, patients, families and employees, the new hospital is sure to be the gift that keeps on giving to kids everywhere.*

*Though now in possession of a gift that keeps on giving, every kid still retains the right to wish for additional gifts in the future.

Lights, camera, children’s hospital!

Move over elementary school plays about the Gettysburg Address, there’s a new crowning achievement in stagecraft coming to town. You may not think of stage plays when you think of hospitals, but that’s exactly what the brilliant architecty people did when designing the new University of Iowa Stead Family Children’s Hospital.

Taking inspiration from stage performances and a certain famous theme park in Florida my parents promised me we’d go to if I got straight As this quarter, the hospital uses the concept of “on-stage” and “off-stage areas” to create a much more pleasant experience for children, families, and easily confused news reporters.

Off-stage areas are hidden from public view. That’s where all the behind-the-scenes action goes on. Care teams can move children privately, food can be delivered quickly, and staff areas and equipment can be kept out of the way. On-stage areas are those that are open to the public, including lounges, play spaces and despite the name, do not require visitors to burst into Shakespearean monologues or belt out what would surely be wonderful renditions of “Let It Go.”

The modern layout is sure to make Iowa’s only nationally ranked children’s hospital a place where kids and their families can get the best care around in a more relaxing atmosphere. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to go practice my lines for my audition as Hospital Visitor #3.

New children’s hospital puts kids first, second and third.

It’s been in the works since before many of its patients were born, but the new, state-of- the-art University of Iowa Stead Family Children’s Hospital has finally opened its doors to the public.

After digging through a nearby sandbox, our investigative team uncovered previously unseen documents revealing many details of what is now the tallest building in Iowa City.

Here’s what we know:

Ground was first broken on the new hospital in the fall of 2012, and it officially opened to the public on February 25, 2017 at a cost of approximately $360 million, or 1.44 billion gumballs.

Designed from the playground up to cater to the needs of children and their families, the hospital features all private rooms with enough space for parents and siblings to comfortably stay. This includes space for two adults to sleep and homey comforts. Each room even includes “Drew’s Lamp,” allowing kids to change the color of the lights on the wall so they can make their room match their own unique style.

New children’s hospital to hold open house, invites everyone reading this headline.

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Pretty much everyone in Iowa and beyond wanting to get a sneak peek at the new University of Iowa Stead Family Children’s Hospital.

As the finishing touches on the new, state of the art, 14-story children’s hospital are put into place before its 2017 opening, curious visitors will get a chance to tour the shiny new building before it opens during an open house on November 5 and 6 from 11 a.m to 6 p.m.

Not only does the new hospital have lots of medical doo-dads that help make it the only nationally ranked children’s hospital in Iowa, but it also has a bunch of super cool features designed just for kids and parents to make their stay more comfortable. A children’s library, a theater, play spaces and more will all be open to the public.

Tours are open to anyone who enjoys experiencing awesome things. The event is totally free, so you can keep saving your allowance for important things like paying your sibling to do your chores. There will be free, light refreshments served during the open house, which now that I think about it, should have been mentioned way earlier.

For more information on how to get to the hospital and where to park during the event, visit ournewhospital.com.

Kid named captain of college football team, majors in inspiration.

While the idea of a six-year-old child being elected captain of a college football team may seem unlikely to most, the honor is common practice at the University of Iowa. Since 2009, it’s been tradition for an elite group of children to be chosen as Kid Captains for the Hawkeyes.

The Kid Captains for the 2016 season represent perhaps the greatest collection of human beings ever assembled and will inspire anyone who comes into contact with them to such a degree that scientists have officially classified this ability as a super power.

To understand how a group of children could be so incredible we interviewed superheroes from around the world, who, as usual, preferred to remain anonymous.

“People praise me all the time as a hero, but the bravery and courage of these kids makes me seem like a sidekick at best,” said one cape-draped superhero.

“Kids all over have posters of me in their rooms, but in my room, I have a poster of these kids,” said another masked man wearing bright colored tights.

Warning: Do not click this link to learn more about the 2016 Kid Captains unless you are truly prepared to be inspired like never before.

2016 Kid Captains

Kinzie Hemann
● Age: 7
● Hometown: Reinbeck, IA
● Game: Iowa vs Miami of Ohio (9/3/2016)

Parker Kress
● Age: 15
● Hometown: Bettendorf, IA
● Game: Iowa vs Iowa State (9/10/16)

Abigail Hooper
● Age: 12
● Hometown: Des Moines, IA
● Game: Iowa vs North Dakota State (9/17/16)

Liam Young
● Age: 3
● Hometown: Cuba City, WI
● Game: Iowa vs. Rutgers (9/24/16)

Konner Guyer
● Age: 7
● Hometown: Eddyville, IA
● Game: Iowa vs. Northwestern (10/1/16)

Carley Neustel
● Age: 10
● Hometown: Central City, IA
● Game: Iowa vs Minnesota (10/8/16)

Maxwell Stancel-Hess
● Age: 11
● Hometown: Marion, IA
● Game: Iowa vs Purdue (10/15/16)

Emeline Dunham
● Age: 10
● Hometown: Wapello, IA
● Game: Iowa vs. Wisconsin (10/22/16)

Aaron Miller
● Age: 11
● Hometown: Hawkeye, IA
● Game: Iowa vs. Penn State (11/5/16)

Hayden Despenas
● Age: 13
● Hometown: Mason City, IA
● Game: Iowa vs. Michigan (11/12/16)

Madelynn Higbee
● Age: 12
● Hometown: Monmouth, IL
● Game: Iowa vs. Illinois (11/19/16)

Seth Nelson
● Age: 15
● Hometown: Remsen, IA
● Game: Iowa vs. Nebraska (11/25/16)

Reed Havlik
● Age: 3
● Hometown: Jesup, IA
● Game: Iowa vs. Post Season Game

New children’s hospital becomes most popular Halloween costume of 2016.

Fairies, pirates, and characters from flash-in-the-pan summer movies take note, kids across Iowa are clamoring for a new costume this Halloween. While most wouldn’t think a state-of-the-art children’s hospital would make for a popular trick-or-treating outfit, it turns out kids can’t wait to walk around their neighborhoods dressed as Iowa’s only nationally ranked children’s hospital.

But why have so many children dropped the superhero capes in exchange for scaled-down versions of a 14-story building? We hit the playground to find out. “It’s the tallest building in Iowa City,” said one gangly 12-year-old, who made his replica of the new University of Iowa Stead Family Children’s Hospital out of cardboard boxes and seven rolls of duct tape.

“The idea of a building with arms and legs has always intrigued me,” said a third grader who wished to remain anonymous, “and when you add the cool features like multiple play areas, a children’s library, and all private patient rooms that the new children’s hospital has, well, my decision was an easy one.”

“At first I wanted to be a kitty for Halloween,” said seven-year-old Emily, “but then I saw the children’s hospital costume, and it really made me want to dress up as a place that has experts in every pediatric specialty all under one roof.”

The popularity of the hospital costume will continue to rise as we get closer to the 2017 opening of the real thing, so don’t be surprised when a group of adorable, architecturally impressive buildings knock on your door this Halloween.

New children’s hospital has growth spurt, becomes tallest building in Iowa City.

Under construction for almost four years, the new University of Iowa Stead Family Children’s Hospital has finally stopped growing up. As the hospital nears completion and is opening in early 2017, the building has reached its peak at a towering height of a gajillion quintillion million billion inches, otherwise known as 164 feet, making it the tallest building in Iowa City.

City officials confirmed the measurement by making the hospital stand against a giant door jamb and placing a ruler on its roof. Despite its impressive height, officials urge visitors not to repeatedly ask the building if it plays professional basketball.

The building contains a total of 14 stories, each filled with a bunch of high-tech thingamajigs designed just for kids. While the new, state-of-the-art facility means big things for Iowa’s only nationally ranked children’s hospital, it’s an even bigger deal to kids around the state and beyond who are currently debating what the coolest use of the lofty perch would be. Debate has boiled down to two main camps, one recommending using the roof as a sweet spot for a game of freeze tag and the other hoping to hold epic “I Spy” tournaments.

The final decision will be made by the Kid Supreme Court by a game of Rock, Paper, Scissors.